i am a dumbass!

Occasionally I will stray from the topic of walking and talk about something that has riled me up for some reason. It doesn't happen often, but it happens. Well today is one of those days.

One of my jobs is teaching at a local community college. I have a set of keys for all the classrooms I use. I keep them on a separate ring, I don't want to carry them all the time. They sported a keychain that someone gave me that said "world's best graphic designer". Okay, it was a lie, but I like the keychain anyway. They weren't marked. So, what I've been doing, and it worked well was to come from class and put them in a cup holder in the car. Always have them whenever I go to campus. I've been doing it about two terms.

Then I started going to the gym and needed my faculty ID to get in. Being the scatterbrained dumbass that I am, I added the faculty ID to my keychain, so I wouldn't loose either. Keeping it in the same cupholder.

Now, most of my friends and family know that I don't regularly lock my car. Hell, I have to force myself to lock my house. It's not high on my list of priorities. I just am too trusting. Yesterday, after the Turkey Trot, I left my handbag, camera and phone on the front seat of my unlocked car in front of Bonnie's house. I was aghast, but it's typical for me.

Last summer my new GPS was stolen from my car. Never even got to use it. (Next weekend when I need it, I won't have it.) I still didn't learn.

The keys are now gone. I discovered it this morning.

It's kind of ironic because over the weekend I thinking what a dumb idea it was to leave them in the car with the ID hanging on them.The situation needed to be rethought.

I tore apart my car, and my office. I don't see them. They were most likely removed by someone. It worries me because my ID was attached. Between the keychain and the ID someone could figure out where they belong too.

But when?

Wednesday I had class, and had them when I left. I'm pretty sure. Will check the gym tomorrow.

Thursday I didn't use the car. So it was in the garage, fairly safe. But more than likely unlocked.

Friday I went to the Farmers Market. Did I lock the car. More than likely not. It was in the garage, probably unlocked, the rest of the time.

Saturday I went to the Turkey Trot, then Bonnie's. I'm guessing they would have stole my cell phone, camera and purse had they been lifted at Bonnie's. So that leaves the Turkey Trot. Maybe. Was the car locked? I doubt it.

So my new year's resolution should be to lock the damn car and stop being so trusting. It's the perfect day for a new year's resolution. A new year starts for me today.

i did the turkey trot in sneakers!

Today was HPI's Turkey Trot. Some towns actually have there's on Thanksgiving. I wore my pink sneakers for the whole race. I didn't fall or anything. Amazing.

It started and ended at the Luckenback Mill.

I really wanted to take pixs of some of the people. Runners and workers in Moravian garb, there were even a couple as Native Americans, and that select group of crazy peopl wearing tiny shorts and tank tops on November 28.

I ran into someone from the 3-Day. Donna, part of Gail F's team, and her husband. Donna took the pix of me. Another sourpuss shot. I'm beginning to think that I'm always a sourpuss! Am I?

Donna's hubby was running, she was speed walking. Her goal was 45 minutes. Mine was not finishing last. We started together and then she was off.

On Main Street I got behind a couple and their shaggy dog. The dog was a pain. He wanted to sniff every leaf and every Christmas decoration downtown. I almost tripped over her several times. Thank goodness I walk with Izzy and Logan, I know how to do the doggie walking dance. I finally managed to pass them.

After Main street we went under the bridge to Sand Island, made the 1-mile loop and came back out to Lehigh. We walked into the wind a lot. Then we went around city hall by the sculpture garden, through the historic area, and back down to the Mill via the "Musikfest" path.

I got past the Mill and couldn't find the finish line. At first I thought they had already taken it down. But then I noticed it past the tents, under the Broad Street overpass. I probably lost 20-30 seconds in my confusion. I actually stopped. I crossed the finish at 52.35. I was not last. At least 10 people were behind me.

I guess that's okay. But I walked as fast as I could and tried not to get distracted. And still got 3MPH.

Next week is the Jingle Bell Run/Walk. My brother Dave might do it with me. He kicks butt on the treadmill and elliptical at the gym, and thinks maybe he can make it out on the streets. I'm sure he can. Plus he'll have his wife Barb as a cheerleader. I bet he beats me by at least 5 minutes.

it twas the day before Thanksgiving ...

... when all thru the house
not a creature was not stirring not even a mouse;
The sneakers were resting on the stairs with no care,
In hopes that this fat girl soon would be there.

I started to go on, but there's not that many people in this house.

There is no feast planned. I invited several people to dinner and no one accepted. They realize of course that I'm a really bad cook. Although I strive to be Martha, I'm not. Such is life. The roasting chicken I bought is way too big for my sister and I, but not nearly as big as a turkey would have been.

Thinking about Thanksgiving made be remember a Shel Silverstein poem my Girl Scouts read during a scout's own the weekend before Thanksgiving. We were at Camp Helena, and there's was a lot of wild turkeys. My vegetarian friends will like this.

Thanksgiving dinner's sad and thankless

Christmas dinner's dark and blue

When you stop and try to see it

From the turkey's point of view.

Sunday dinner isn't sunny

Easter feasts are just bad luck

When you see it from the viewpoint

of a chicken or a duck.

Oh how I once loved tuna salad

Pork and lobsters, lamb chops too

'Til I stopped and looked at dinner

From the dinner's point of view.

Enough about Thanksgiving.

I have worked out a bit this week. I am still sick. My cold is about 90% gone and I can breath again. My ear was infected and is still blocked and ringing. I can't really hear out of it and it has an odd echo. I now know how crazy people go crazy. I don't really have another $90 for the doctor, so this is how it shall be. I will adapt. When you don't have medical insurance that's what you do. Adapt. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Or at least that's what my mama told me.

Friday I went out walking with Betsy and the dogs. I was supposed to do the Philly marathon Sunday. That didn't happen. Watching the start on television was bittersweet. Monday I did the walking path at the College, then after class went to the gym. I did about 20 minutes on the eliptical and another 20 on this bicycle-like thing. It pedaled like a bike but your legs were out in front of you. It was actually nice, and had little impact on my knees, which is good. Two thing I can do in that gym. Yeah me. Sadly today it closes at 5 for the holiday and my class isn't over till 6. I will, however, do the walking path. I'll also need to go at least 3 miles both Friday and Saturday because the Turkey Trot is Saturday. I do not want to finish last.

I also signed up for the First Night 5K, New Year's Eve. So I have three 5Ks in the next 5 weeks. That should get this fat girl moving again.

I need to move. I walked the stairs at Acopian yesterday and was breathing like daddy by the fourth floor.  A few weeks ago I could get to the top without breaking a sweat. A few short weeks of limited activity is undoing everything I accomplished over the summer.

This must stop.

This will stop.

the big bad head cold that won't go away

It's back. My head cold from two weeks ago has made a return visit. I feel like crap. Yet, I'm going to do the walking path today and stairs before school, and hit the gym for elliptical after class. Not much, but it's something. I stayed in bed till after 8, then laid on the couch in my jammies till after 9. I was the poster girl this morning for lazy.

Friday I walked with Betsy and the dogs. I was wiped out when we were done. The last few blocks were very long. I chocked it up to the end of the cold. I know know that it was the beginning of the cold coming back.

Sunday it was beautiful. I had planned a five mile walk, but instead I cleaned up graffiti on my garage and helped a few neighbors. It was certainly an upper body workout!

Monday I went to the gym at did the elliptical for about 15 minutes at 3.5-4 MPH. Not bad for my second time. I even figured out how to make the TV work!

I've been thinking a lot about what's next. I had signed up to do the Philly marathon but I withdrew. 

I have been looking at stair climbs. There's one in Philly March 20 for the American Lung Assn. The website  says Most people who can walk 3 miles can climb 1,088 stairs in about 20 minutes. Yeah, sure. With my knees? They also have one in Wilkes Barre at the Wachovia Arena, same day.  It's 1,224 steps up and down the arena. Hmmmm. That might be doable. I could practice at Fisher Stadium. The downs always give my knees a break. I'd have to be able to do it 3 times, I think. They start people 20 seconds apart. Crap, these people are probably running. I don't run. On Feb 28 there is a stair climb for  CF sponsored by wawa. It's 53 flights, 1019 steps.

My head is spinning with wild ideas to keep moving.

For now it's 2 5Ks: the Turkey Trot and the Jingle Bell run. My goal is to not come in last place.

I wanna go here

After my disaster at the gym I went to the barf-a-teria in search of healthy food. (wait, wait. Now it's a "food court". Same crap. Different name.) I ended up getting a salad and a slice of veggie pizza. It would have been good if it wasn't soggy.

I took both back to Communications Hall to eat. The Communications department rips apart the Sunday NYTimes and plasters it on the wall. Right at the table I chose was a three-full page article on "Hiking Into History". Suddenly the disaster in the gym seemed far away. I was in love with walking again. I no longer cared that I was out of shape.

From The Times: "The Ridgeway is the oldest continuously used road in Europe, dating back to the Stone Age. Situated in southern England, built by our Neolithic ancestors, it’s at least 5,000 years old, and may even have existed when England was still connected to continental Europe, and the Thames was a tributary of the Rhine." The ancient road is about 40 miles.

I wanna go. Now. But there's a couple of problems. Money, time, and oh, yeah, I don't fly.  But it's another goal. One that I can save money for. Time I can plan. Especially if I include enough for a ocean voyage. A girl can dream.

If you have a dream of walking thru ancient England, you can come along. Here's the website to visit in the meantime.

Again, I borrowed the image from Wikipedia.

the 10th circle of Hell

The Divine Comedy written by Dante, is a 14th century epic poem about the Christian afterlife. I thought about it while I was at the gym today with the tears streaming down my face. I was certain I had entered the tenth circle of Hell. I was equally certain that Dante only mentioned nine. Nevertheless it gives me an excuse to use an Italian fresco in a walking blog and that's always a good thing.

I arrived for orientation at 11 sharp. But I forgot my ID card, so I had to go back to the adjunct office to get it. So we might have started at 11:10. I was taken back to the young man for my orientation. I think his name was Josh. It doesn't matter. He was barely old enough to have facial hair. I'm guessing he's one of the Colleges athletes.

He pulled out a goldenrod sheet of paper and took me thru the quick circuit. (Seated leg press, leg extension, leg curl, pulldown, chest press, shoulder press, biceps curl, triceps press, back extension, ab machine) Never asked my name, what my fitness goal was, nothing. He demoed each machine. I tried  it, and we went on to the next. I immediately forgot what he said about the prior machine. 10 minutes later we were done. He asked if I wanted the goldenrod paper. I said hell yes.  And then I was released into a gym alone. It wasn't pretty.

Instructions on the goldenrod paper. 1) Warm up with 5-10 minutes of light aerobic activity and mild flexibilty exercises. We only covered weight machines. So I thought I'd try the elliptical. Heard it was easy. After staring at it for a while I figured out how to make it work....sort of. I got it going and I was quickly zooming at 5mph and was ready for takeoff I managed to get it to stop, but then it erased everyhting I had already done from the monitor. Total time, maybe 2.5 minutes

So maybe that wasn't a good idea. Maybe I can get the treadmill to work. Turn that on and start walking. It's barely moving. I couldn't get it to go more than .25 miles per hour. Meanwhile around me people are running. Not a good sign. Should have went home then and there. But I was stupid and didn't.

2) Use a complete range of motion with each exercise to fully develop range strength and flexiblilty.  3) Never hold your breath while training. (Always a good rule of thumb. Makes life possible.) Try to exhale while exerting the muscles and inhale when return in to the starting position. (You're kidding right? This is one reason I can't do yoga. The whole controlling breathing thing drives me crazy.)

4) Move slower, never faster, if in doubt about the speed of movement. 5) Select a  resistance of weight that allows you to complete: Beginner: 12-15 repetitions. Form should be smooth and steady thru the full range of motion. If the min. number of reps is not achieved, the weight is too heavy. If the max can be exceeded, then the weight is too light. (Swell. How about giving me some starting point and then work from there. The machines are all set at 250 pounds and 100 pound 18-year-old girls are lifting them.)

6) Rest a min of 48 hrs and not more than 96 hrs between workouts. End of instructions.

So I went to the "seated leg press". My knee was supposed to line up with this gizmo and it didn't. I couldn't get the seat to move. I pulled, pushed, went up and down and left and right. Nothing. It worked fine when he did it. I tried it without moving the seat it hurt my knee.

It got worse from there. I could never find the right machine and walked around the gym trying to find them. Such a waste of time. I did manage to get one adjusted, but that's it. By the middle point the tears were streaming down my face and I was getting more and more frustrated. Everything hurt, I could never find the right weight, it was always to light or too heavy. Finally I was finished. Thank goodness. I was sweating like a pig and I didn't do much.

I decided to give the elipitcal a second shot. I picked one with the tv on. ESPN. Left it on  figuring ou the tv can wait for another day. Turned it on and got it moving and realized I was going backward. It said I was going 3.2 MPH which is about what I walk on the streets, but in 5 minutes I was exhausted but pushed on.

Then I had an epiphany. And it wasn't pretty. I thought all this walking and stair climbing I was doing had me in decent shape, cardio-wise. I have apparently been kidding myself. I'm not in any better shape than the Lazy-Boy potato that lives with me. That was quite a kick in the ass.

So for now, I'll go back but only to do the elliptical. (They don't have a stairmaster.) I only did 10 minutes today at 3.2 MPH. My first goal is 30 minutes. Then I'll up the speed and difficulty.

I'll save my money so that when I return to a gym for weight training, I can have a month or two with a personal trainer. I'll kill myself with those damn machines without one.

(Image from Wikipedia) Artist: Domenico di Michelino "Dante and his Poem", 1465, fresco, Florence Cathedral. Maybe someday I'll actually get to visit it.

ready or not, here I come

I walked Friday, Saturday and Sunday. I'm back on track,  or at least I was. Thursday I started hacking, by Friday I had the chills, and Saturday I was congested. Oh it was a killer of a cold but it wasn't the piggie flu or the regular flu, so I don't mind. I did battle with OTC drugs and it worked. Monday was the worse. I think it was peak day.

Tuesday was better, but when I walked to Pfenning I felt it. It felt like I just did 15 miles. I walked across campus. Later (my office is in the basement of Watson) I needed to go upstairs, so I ran up the steps like usual and by the time I reached the upper floor I was panting. Say what? Clearly my lungs were not clear.

Today I feel better. And it's a good thing. It's the big day. Orientation at the College gym. 11 am, sharp. I'm both excited and terrified. Forrays into gyms have never been successful, and sometimes are painful.

The plan after today is to go after class at 6:30. But since I'll be there at 11 I'm going before class. Class starts at 3.

Hopefully I'm dressed for both. I don't want to lug a gym bag. Today I'm wearing yoga pants and a tank top, and my Finn Casual shoes. I have a nice sweater to wear for class. More under-dressed than the average day, but less under-dressed than some other faculty member who look like they just rolled out of bed in their sweats.

They told me to bring a lock for the locker. I'm not going to bother. If they want my sweater, they can have it. I'm keeping my keys with me. My handbag will be either in the truck of the car or the adjunct office. I'm not a big fan of locks, even after my GPS Flora was stolen.

Other updates from the week past
Friday I went to the Dr. after I walked. My BP was 145/90. Not great, hell not even good, but better than the last time. I take what I can get. At least he didn't yell at me. My weight was 236. So since I started this adventure two years ago I've lost 14 pounds and three sizes. Somehow doesn't seem fair. I don't think I lost any inches this year. My 199 goal gets further and further out of reach. At this rate it will be about 2020 and according to the Mayan calendar the world will end in 2012. So it's a moot point. Besides, hasn't someone predicted the end of the world every year of my life? I think so.

Shaku did walk the 3-Day in Dallas. It looks like she had a blast. I'm glad she could have a real 3-Day experience.

My training walk group is meeting at the Thai Kitchen for a celebration dinner Friday. (We need to pick someplace that had also had vegan food). I think we're going to further explore the idea of a walking club.

Inching back toward activity

My sister Barb called Monday morning. "Did you go walking this morning?"

"No"

"Why not, it's a beautiful day."

I offered up all my typical excuses and she pretty much told me to get my fat butt out for a walk. So I did.

I left for school early and did the 1-mile track around the College, in my heels, carrying my briefcase. As I passed the gym I thought about checking it out. Me, a gym. Right.

When I got to  my classroom I checked out the gym on-line. There was minimal information but the hours were good. My classes finish at 6 and they were open till 10 on my class nights. It's also free for students and employees.

About 6:30 all the students were gone so I went over to the gym. Ran into a colleague from one of my other jobs and talked about work for a half-hour. Finally I went in. My bubble burst.

There is nobody to show you what to do or make you a program. You get what you pay for, I guess. The man said I just needed to was bring my ID card, fill out a wavier and get a lock for my locker and that's it. All the machines had picture instructions on them. Follow the pictures.

Say what?

The last time I did a gym at my other job WITH supervision and I was often scolded for using the machines incorrectly. Following pictures is not for me.

So I'm still looking.

I could use the gym at Kirby, the one I liked, but it's in Easton. I'm far too lazy to drive a half hour, work out for a hour, and then drive home. That's pretty much the reason I stopped going the first time. It's very cheap, about $25 a term, and they now offer personal trainers, if I read the email right.

I love water aerobics and they offer them for a reasonable price at Cedar Crest, but again, the travel time is crazy. I have multiple jobs I have no free time for travel.

The Y is close, has a pool, classes and machines. But it's very expensive. I have no money.

So my sister calling from Kentucky telling me to get my lazy butt in gear is going to have to do for now. It's flexible, fits the budget, and takes off inches. I signed up for the Jingle Bell Run on Dec. 5. (http://jbr-lv.kintera.org/faf/home/default.asp?ievent=315466 Join me. We'll make a team. Heaven knows this family has arthritis!) It's a 5K and I swore them off. But I know they keep the finish line up for us pokey people. I'm also going to look for the info on the Turkey Trot. Another 5K in historic Bethlehem. Again, I know they keep the finish line up. (http://tinyurl.com/ygm3kmw)

Today, I'll be walking before class again. I'm also taking my camera to see if I can get a shot of the College gym for the blog. I'll be walking with Betsy and the pups on Friday afternoon. And Bonnie called and said she'd walk with me Saturday and Sunday. That will get me thru the week. Maybe all I need to do is just develop new habits

We'll see Friday if it does anything for my BP. If history is any indication, that would be a no.

---------

Postscript. Read the waiver he gave me before class. It had a small section on the bottom that had you sign to refuse the orientation? The man Monday night said nothing about orientation. So I went in again. This time there was a young athletic student behind the desk. I asked her about this "orientation". She said sure and bee bopped across the gym for a clip board. I signed up for Wednesday morning, 11 am. Weights are scary without supervision. But I'll give the eliptical a shot. And maybe the stair climber. I can't hurt myself too badly on them, can I?

Fat lazy girl not walking.

I really have been hating myself the last couple weeks because I can not get my fat lard butt out walking or stair climbing. I don't know if I'm burned out or what. Any ideas on how to light the fire again?

I even had a great moment on Friday and it didn't motivate me. I was driving Lyds car. She was the passenger since she had a medical procedure. I was really far from her house, but my car was in front. So I left her car run, and went to move mine. I walked to my car, moved it another 25 feet toward the corner. Then for no apparent reason I ran back to her car. It was maybe a 1/2 block. I haven't run a half block since middle school. I hopped into the car and pulled into the newly opened spot. Then it hit me. I wasn't breathing hard. I wasn't panting. I ran and physically I was normal. I was excited. But not excited enough to get walking again.

Today it's beautiful out. I should have walked for hours. I had planned to go with a friend and she called and bagged out. So instead of going out alone I sat at this stupid computer and worked all day. And snacked. I have turned eating into an Olympic event the last two weeks. I've been grazing. And I don't normally graze! I'm eating like there is no tomorrow. And if I keep it up there isn't. My sweet tooth is in another universe it's so active. The timing is awful too. I need to go to the doctor at the end of the week. There will be no weight loss this time.I don't have a clue what my BP is. This will not be pretty.

I walked one day this week. Friday afternoon with Betsy and the pups. And last Sunday I did feel guilty enough to take the scenic route down o Aharts and back. Both times I wore my new pink shoes and they were comfy.

Yesterday I killed another pedometer. I was helping Elin move. It was fine at the old house with all those steps. (So was I come to think of it.) I will not miss the steps at Elin's old house. The front ones are horrible. The ones to the second floor are really horrible (and they've been fixed. They were insane before!) And the attic ones are beyond description. Of course those I did about 50 times. I got Elin and her broken leg up to the second floor (first time in 3 months) and then I shuttled boxes from the attic. Later, Elins friend Charlette came and helped me. It broke at the new place. Walking in the back door carrying nothing. Doesn't really matter. Since the 3-Day I think I've had one day over 10,000 steps. Most average 5,000. I haven't even bothered writing it down on logging it on beewell.com.

I'm thinking of signing up for a stair climb in February, but am not sure if my knees could take it. I have the form here for the Jingle Bell Run/Walk. It's a 5K. I've sworn off 5Ks but it's for arthritis, so maybe I should reconsider. Will it be enough to get me moving again. The Turkey Trot is Thanksgiving weekend. Again, a 5K.

What to do, what to do? This fat girl needs to stop grazing and start walking again. Any ideas to motivate me would be appreciated. "Just do it" won't work.